Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Loneliness


Loneliness…  
by Jane

Much intrigued by Irene’s sharing of “loneliness”, I felt compelled to find answers from the Bible, the way that Albert strongly recommended all these years in Bible studies.

Much to my surprise, the word “loneliness” was never mentioned in the entire Bible (NIV).

Instead, I discovered In Genesis:

  • · Our Creator is a triune God (three in one Godhead). 
  • · We are created in God’s own image. 
  • · After Adam, God also created Eve, as his helper and companion. 
  • · Animal Kingdom, birds and fishes are created “according to their kinds” in different species. 
  • · Noah’s ark…. Animals two by two entered the ark and survived the flood. 

Could this imply that loneliness was never part of God’s creation, but simply a breakdown in our relationships with each other and our Father in heaven?

In the New Testament, Jesus was found in lonely places, only by choice:

  • Mark 1:45
Instead he went out and began to talk freely, spreading the news. As a result, Jesus could no longer enter a town openly but stayed outside in lonely places. Yet the people still came to him from everywhere.
  • Luke 5:16
But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.· 

Jesus was alone, purposely;
  •  Mark 6:47
Later that night, the boat was in the middle of the lake, and he was alone on land.

  • ·Matthew 14:23
After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone,
  • Luke 9:36
When the voice had spoken, they found that Jesus was alone. The disciples kept this to themselves and did not tell anyone at that time what they had seen.


Yet Jesus was never lonely:

  • John 8:16
But if I do judge, my decisions are true, because I am not alone. I stand with the Father, who sent me.

  • ·John 16:32
“A time is coming and in fact has come when you will be scattered, each to your own home. You will leave me all alone. Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me.


In fact, Jesus gave us the wonderful promise: 
  • Matthew 11:28
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

Does this not also apply to the broken hearted, discouraged, depressed (although that is another word not found in the Bible), the wounded, the lonely and the lost? 

Let us not forget…. 

  • · Malachi 3:7
Ever since the time of your ancestors you have turned away from my decrees and have not kept them. Return to me, and I will return to you,” says the Lord Almighty.
  • · Hebrews 13:5 
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

13 comments:

  1. Appreciate your sharing Jane. Here's my tuppence worth...from the net...

    LONELINESS
    I. Representative Biblical usages

    A. Old Testament

    1. Hebrew word badad - "isolated, separated, apart, alone"
    Gen. 2:18 - "it is not good for man to be alone"
    2. Hebrew word yahid - "solitary, isolated, lonely"
    Ps. 25:16 - "I am lonely and afflicted"

    B. New Testament

    1. Greek word eremos - "abandoned, solitary, lonely"
    Lk. 4:42 - "He departed and went to a lonely place"

    II. Defining loneliness

    A. Our created condition as human beings

    1. Created as social creatures, relational beings; we need each other; "no man is an island" -
    Gen. 2:18 - "not good for man to be alone"

    2. God-given needs and desires for love, acceptance, belonging, relating, companionship,
    friendship with other men and God.

    B. Differentiating some terms

    1. Aloneness - being separated from other people.
    a. It is healthy to be alone sometimes.
    b. Can be alone and not lonely. Some personalities prefer.

    2. Solitude - choosing to withdraw and be alone
    a. to retreat - Lk. 4:42; Jn. 6:15
    b. to rest and relax - Matt. 6:31,32
    c. to pray - Matt. 14:13,23; Mk. 1:35
    d. to hear from God - Dan. 10:8
    e. to be silent - Lam. 3:28

    3. Loneliness - a psychological state of mind or feeling of being excluded or estranged from
    other people and/or God.

    a. Not necessarily related to physical situations of aloneness or solitude. Possible to be lonely in a crowd.

    b. Our need for relational interactive socialization is not satisfactorily fulfilled.
    (1) may be unfulfilled God-given desires
    (2) may be unfulfilled selfish indulgence of God-given desires

    c. Often a feeling of isolation, separation, detachment from companionship, fellowship,
    intimacy, or community.

    d. May be sense of separation or fear of being forsaken by God.

    C. Contemporary social situation

    1. Ours has been called the "lonely society"

    2. Some have indicated that 75-90% of adult Americans suffer from chronic loneliness.

    (to be cont'd...)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Loneliness in the bible (cont'd)

    III. Circumstances in which loneliness may be experienced. May feel lonely when...

    A. guilt causes you to feel separated
    1. from God - Ps. 25:16
    2. from other men - Gen. 27:1-29; 32:24; 33:1-17
    B. you feel rejected, abandoned, deserted by others - Jn. 16:32; II Tim. 4:16,17
    C. you are voluntarily or forcefully removed from safe, secure environment
    D. you experience the "let down" after a spiritual victory - I Kings 19:10,14
    E. previous successes or popularity have subsided
    F. you have suffered a defeat
    G, you are too busy chasing "success" to relate to others.
    H. you are "burned out" after having tried to achieve by self-effort - Jn. 8:29
    I. you are separated from the group by leadership responsibilities - "lonely at the top" -
    Numb. 11:14,17; Deut. 1:9,12; Matt 26:38-40
    J. you have suffered the loss of a loved one by death or divorce
    K. you are fearful and timid - I Jn. 4:18
    L. you feel inferior, unworthy, self-condemnation, insecure
    M. you are physically removed or separated from those you know and love.
    N. others reject or ostracize you for being different, or for nonconformity
    O. you fail to resolve conflict and misunderstanding; estrangement
    P. you fail to communicate; avoidance; repression; stuff emotions
    Q. you have chosen to "stand alone" against world, sin, religion (Jere. 15:17)
    R. others are not enthused about your interests or project.
    S. you don't take the time to enjoy others and have fun together
    T. you have been prejudged, stereotyped, pegged, put in a box
    U. your particular talents and abilities and personality are not appreciated
    V. you don't fit in - economically, intellectually, politically, religiously, etc.
    W. you don't feel connected, bonded, able to relate -emotionally, spiritually
    X. friends only relate on superficial level; won't get serious and real
    Y. you have been excluded from a particular social grouping
    Z. you feel like an outsider, the "odd man out"
    (to be cont'd...)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Loneliness in the bible (cont'd)

    AA. your present responsibilities (parenting, vocation, etc.) preclude or diminish the development of relationships
    BB. you retire from your vocation and no longer relate to colleagues daily
    CC. another person is regarded as your "life," & they can't meet all your needs
    DD. you do not feel a sense of oneness, unity and intimacy with your mate
    EE. you have refused to receive the love and intimacy of your mate - SoS 5:3-6
    FF. you have been betrayed by a mate or a friend - Gen. 3:12
    GG. you alienate others by your verbosity, accusations, insensitive comments
    HH. you alienate others by using them in competitive or economic success
    II. you alienate others by criticism, negativism, sarcasm, pessimism, hostility, cruelty,
    JJ. you alienate others by your selfishness, egotism, or spiritual pride.
    KK. you make work, projects, things, possessions more important than people.
    LL. you feel you cannot perform up to expectations
    MM. others are too preoccupied with their concerns to relate with you
    NN. crisis arises and no one offers to listen or assist.
    OO. you feel left behind by a fast-paced technological society
    PP. children grow up, go to school, leave home
    QQ. isolated due to injury; secluded or ignored due to age (Ps. 71:9,18)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Loneliness in the bible(cont'd)

    IV. Dealing with loneliness

    A. Secular solutions
    1. Mental adjustment. Positive thinking. "Look on the bright side." "Be aggressive."
    Develop communication skills.
    2. Activity. Involvement. Get busy. Change jobs. Join a club. Move. Travel. Have fun.
    Try something new. Be adventurous. Go to church. Volunteer. Get married, or remarried.
    3. Results of such advice have sometimes led to workaholism, alcoholism, sexual promiscuity,
    various addictions, burn-out, increased loneliness, depression, suicide.
    B. Biblical solutions
    1. Regeneration, reconciliation with God. Col. 1:21,22
    2. Confess known sins - I Jn. 1:9
    3. Accept God's forgiveness - Eph. 1:7; Col. 1:14
    4. Forgive others - Eph. 4:32
    5. Recognize and affirm the presence of God in Christ - Josh. 1:9; Ps. 23; Isa. 41:10; 43:2;
    Matt. 28:20; Jn. 16:32; Heb. 13:5
    6. Accept the work of the Comforter, the Paraclete, the Holy Spirit of Christ -
    Jn. 14:16,26; 15:26; 16:7
    7. Participate in the fellowship and community of the Body of Christ, the Church - Heb. 10:25
    8. Participate in the functional ministry of the Body of Christ in using your spiritual gifts -
    Rom. 12:4-6; I Cor. 12

    © 1999 James A. Fowler

    In Christ
    Irene

    ReplyDelete
  5. P.S. I saw what I wanted to see (by Irene)

    A. Psalm 25:16-21 (NIV)

    16 Turn to me and be gracious to me,
    for I am LONELY and afflicted.
    17 Relieve the troubles of my heart
    and free me from my anguish.
    18 Look on my affliction and my distress
    and take away all my sins.
    19 See how numerous are my enemies
    and how fiercely they hate me!
    20 Guard my life and rescue me;
    do not let me be put to shame,
    for I take refuge in you.
    21 May integrity and uprightness protect me,
    because my hope, Lord,[a] is in you.

    Psalm 22:1 (NIV)

    1 My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?
    Why are you so far from saving me,
    so far from my cries of anguish?

    "David experienced profound moments of loneliness. He had times when he was being hunted by his own son and had to leave his own family. Many Psalms address his deep loneliness, and he often plead to God for mercy in those times."

    B. Matthew 27:46 (NIV)
    46 About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli,[a] lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”).

    "Jesus, too, felt loneliness at times, more so when he was being persecuted and placed on a cross. A most painful time in his life. He felt God had abandoned him. His most faithful followers abandoned him in his hour of need. The people who followed him and loved him before he was crucified were no longer there for him. He knew exactly what it felt like to be alone, and so He know exactly what we go through when we feel loneliness."



    ReplyDelete
  6. "An assured part of God’s pledged blessing to us is delay and suffering…..
    God is going to test me with delays; and with the delays will come suffering, but through it all stands God’s pledge: His new covenant with me in Christ, and His inviolable promise of every lesser blessing that I need."
    (Streams in the Desert)

    ReplyDelete
  7. The song for this Sunday’s RHG, Blessings… (Request of Uncle Roy)

    Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops?
    What if Your healing comes through tears?
    What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You’re near?
    What if trials of this life are your mercies in disguise?

    What if my greatest disappointments,
    Or the aching of this life,
    Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy?
    What if trials of this life,
    The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
    Are your mercies in disguise?

    jane

    ReplyDelete
  8. Are you lonely, downcast, discouraged, defeated or devastated?


    2 Corinthians 1:3-5
    Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.

    After Jesus ascended to heaven, He sent the promised Holy Spirit to live within the hearts of those who believe...

    John 14:26
    But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.

    That is why the Holy Spirit is also referred to as “the Comforter”.

    Allow the indwelt Holy Spirit to accompany us through all walks of life’s difficult situations, putting our Trust/Faith in our heavenly Father who loves us very much and have great plans for our lives!!

    Once "lonely"

    ReplyDelete
  9. Once "lonely", good to know that the Holy Spirit is our 'Comforter", thank you for your sharing kindness.

    I hope that the Holy Spirit will be by my side escorting me to a safe place when the next mega earthquake strikes Vancouver...and He the Comforter checks that I'm secure and safe once I brave that single journey to 'wherever' on my own with Him.

    Blessings
    Irene :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Dear Irene,

    May I?

    “Who made the mountains? Who made the sea?
    …somebody bigger than you and me.”

    So what about earthquakes and tsunami?

    Psalm 46:1-3
    God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
    Therefore WE WILL NOT FEAR,
    though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
    though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging.

    Was “lost” (but now am found)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Dear Anonymous Was "lost" (but now am found) and Once 'lonely'

    Your noms de plume brought to mind John Newton's 'Amazing Grace' -

    "Amazing grace, how sweet the sound...
    'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
    And grace my fears relieved..."

    Appreciates your sharing and encouragement

    "I sought the Lord, and he answered me;
    he delivered me from all my fears.
    Those who look to him are radiant;
    their faces are never covered with shame.
    This poor man called, and the Lord heard him;
    he saved him out of all his troubles."
    -(Psalm 34:4-6 NIV)

    Blessings
    Irene

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just repeating what I posted Oct 16 in response to 若詩's posting..

      (Scripture reference: Psalm 34:4-6)

      "Look to Me continually for help, comfort, and companionship. Because I am always by your side, the briefest glance can connect you with Me. When you look to Me for help, it flows freely from My Presence. This recognition of your need for Me, in small matters as well as large ones, keeps you spiritually alive."

      Irene

      Delete
  12. Dear Irene,

    Praise the Lord!!

    Your dialogue with once “lonely” and was “lost” spoke to me about loneliness, trusting in the Lord in times of trouble and ways to call upon the Lord in times of need.

    This morning, the Lord taught me another kind of fear, fear Him:

    Hebrews 11:7
    By faith Noah, when warned about things not yet seen, in HOLY FEAR built an ark to save his family. By his faith he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness that is in keeping with faith.

    Acts 9:31
    Then the church throughout Judea, Galilee and Samaria enjoyed a time of peace and was strengthened. Living in the fear of the Lord and encouraged by the Holy Spirit, it increased in numbers.

    It was a very good reminder to me regarding the consequence of my sins (in thoughts, words or deeds).
    Even though I can hide them from others, the Lord knows/sees very clearly my hidden intentions.

    “Who we become in this life and what we do in this life are subject to divine evaluation – not only daily, but also eternally.”
    (Day by Day, Charles Stanley, Nov 1)

    Peace,
    jane

    ReplyDelete